So Far, So Good.
I turned 25 this month. And what a crazy 25 years it’s been. 25 years made up of days I thought my world was ending to the days so good I didn’t want them to end. Years of rough patches and loss. Years of losing loved ones, learning the harsh truth of outliving people at just the age of 25. Together, those difficult years mixed with years of success and immense happiness have led me to where and who I am today.
I turned 25 this month. What an extremely significant but also insignificant milestone at the same time. An oxymoron, I guess. Yes, I lived another healthy year on this crazy, but beautiful planet. Yes, I’ve officially hit a quarter of a century old. But, in the grand scheme of things, or more specifically life, that’s a pretty low number. Considering the average human lifespan in the US ends around 77, I have 13 more years before I even hit halfway.
It’s weird though, it’s an accomplishment to hit your mid-twenties but nothing comes from turning 25. What I mean is, at 16 you can drive a car, at 18 the world opens up a whole lot more to being a legal adult and even more at 21 when you are officially the legal drinking age. But 25? It’s Just another year! I know that is not the point of a Birthday, but it feels more important and even more real when something comes from turning another age older. Something more than extra responsibility and bigger bills.
I’ve always had a pretty negative view on growth and getting older. If you’ve read any of my past blogs, you are more than familiar with my distasteful feelings on the concept of “getting older”. And although I am still not fully comfortable with the concept, I’ve come to accept it. Age is just like change, scary but sort of beautiful. Without it, life would get pretty mundane. And even though it usually comes unwarranted and unwanted, it sets up your future. I’ve always hated change, too (probably more than aging), but after it happens you can see your own growth. That’s the only thing that has kept me positive in 2023 so far. That growth and realizing you can’t control others emotions or reactions, so letting it gnaw on you after the fact only hurts yourself. Just following those two realizations this year has kept me going. And, so far so good!
I spent my actual birthday surrounded by family and friends, turning a milestone meant for a single day celebration into a weekend long event. On Saturday, my incredibly thoughtful parents threw me another birthday party (they always have the best parties), where we did a crab boil for the first time. Words can not give justice to how delicious that meal was. I can still taste the flavors from the vegetable and seafood filled pot! The day ended with my immediate and extended family singing Happy Birthday as I blew out giant ‘2’ & ‘5’ candles on my favorite cake (carvel, of course).
Sunday, my actual birthday, the celebration continued as my closest friends dressed up and spent the day with me. We laughed, we drank wine, we ate delicious food, enjoyed the sunset view from my apartment and had perfect, adult fun. It was everything I wanted and just reminded me how truly loved I am. But alas, Monday hit and normal life resumed. Again, so far so good.
I have much to learn this year as 2023 and my 25th (or technically 26th year) has just begun. But I look forward to what’s to come. I hope I can continue with my inner-growth as I let in more love and positivity, while not allowing stress and angst to cloud my emotions.. I don’t really know what came over me, but since the start of 2023 and the end of age 24, the world has become a little bit brighter. Maybe I’ve started living life rather than just participating in it. Maybe I have finally become fully comfortable with myself allowing more self love and love from others. Maybe I’ve realized just how much of an impact I can make. There are so many realizations I have made in just the past couple weeks and although I don’t know the root of where these realizations are coming from, I have a weight lifted off of my shoulders.
Here’s to 25. Here’s to continuing to be me. Continuing to be better. Continuing to love, to be loved and to let love love go. Continuing to succeed. Continuing to change. And, continuing to grow! Here’s to turning the phrase “mid-20’s” into a phrase that doesn’t lead me to nausea!