The “7 Friendship” Theory

The “7 friendship” theory has existed for well over a long time, but thanks to the biggest social media platform TikTok, it has become a new trend for users of the platform to create and share the aforementioned viral videos. You usually learn about friendship statistics and theories in philosophy class by a philosopher who focused their efforts on studying friendship patterns throughout History. I did at least. But, it wasn’t until a 60-second slideshow put to fun music featuring the seven types of friendship, that I learned what the “7 Friends” theory  was. 

 

The “7 friends” theory basically states that friendships can be categorized into 7 various forms, all valuable in their own ways. It doesn’t necessarily mean you need to have seven friends exactly or one per category, it just means every friendship you have in your life has a specific reason and fits into a different category. As I start to list my personal “7 friends” trend, I will have the same person in multiple categories and I may even have multiple people in one category. This is mostly due to the fact that my friends in my life have been here for a while and those friendships have either continued to grow and blossom or become distant, causing changes within the categories. 

Without further ado, here is a two-dimensional glance at my personal friendships over the years. 

  • The friend you’ve had since you were little 

The friend I have had since I was little, or my longest friend thus far I guess, would be Kealy Flynn. This has changed many times over the years as I have lost touch or grown apart from some of my youngest friendships. I have a few  friends that would be able to list multiple people within this first category from things like Mommy & Me and preschool all the way through high school. For me, I can’t truthfully say that any of my friendships formed from Birth- Elementary School have lasted. Yes, we still like each other’s posts on social media, but the friendship bond is no longer there, mostly due to growing up and growing apart.  Kealy Flynn has been in my life since the 6th grade, so although I was already 12 when our friendship started to tighten, there is not a day that  it hasn’t gotten stronger since. Being able to share the memories from our awkward stage to college graduation and everything in between, has created a connection like no other. Growing up together helped us to remain close as we navigated through the same problems and enjoyed the same celebrations. Now, as we both settle into our mid-twenties we continue to help each other through our own obstacles and praise one another for our successes. 


 

  • The friend that could make you laugh in any situation

This is a hard one. My friends are extremely funny and every single one of them makes me laugh for different reasons. However, when I really have to narrow it down, I am left with two people who are true comedians, both Kealy Flynn and Ali Mejia. Kealy has been making me laugh since the 6th grade. Whether she’s making an actual joke, being hilariously melodramatic, or just telling a story- she knows the exact words to use and way to say them to make everyone in the room not only listen, but crack up. Ali, on the other hand, is a natural comedian. She is so funny without even trying, she was runner-up to win the superlative for “Funniest Female in 12th Grade”. It’s so important to surround yourself with people that can make you smile, laugh and have fun. It is easy to get wrapped up in the mundane day-to-day of life, so being able to let loose and laugh it up with your best friends helps get us through those moments without even realizing it. 

  • The friend you can go forever without talking to but nothing changes 

This category goes to the two people in my life who have moved away; Lizzy Johnston and Ali Mejia. Both of these girls have been in my life for many years and have remained extremely close to me during those years. After graduating from Florida State University, the school we all attended together, I came back to South Florida and they went elsewhere. Lizzy just a little North to upper-Orlando and Ali moved all the way to Colorado Springs, an hour from the nearest airport. Due to accessibility, I see and speak to Lizzy much more, as it is just a few hour car ride and one gas tank to get to one another. Ali on the other hand, is much further and much more expensive to travel to, so I am able to see her only a few times a year. Both of these girls, with a slight emphasis on Ali, are the two I can go forever without talking to where nothing changes. Every time I see Ali we spend hours catching up, each taking turns telling stories and sharing life updates.  Although sometimes I feel distant when we go a few weeks without talking, that feeling is completely eradicated the second we see or speak to each other. Its special knowing friendships can be on such a deep level that even distance and time can not separate them. 

  • The friend you can tell anything to

Rachel Aron. If there’s one word to describe Rachel, it’s loyal. She is a friend I will have for the rest of my life due to her dedication to just being a good friend. Rachel and I have been best friends since the start of Junior Year, a connection that has only grown stronger since that day. She is the exact non-judgmental friend who offers real advice because she actually cares that everyone needs. With only a few arguments since our first day meeting in Junior year till present day, Rachel is the friend to keep my secrets and advise me on things I may not be comfortable sharing with anyone else with a completely unbiased opinion one hundred percent of the time.

  • The friend that’s like a sister

This one goes to my sisters, Brooke and Brianna. I know that the category is “the friend that is LIKE a sister”, but my sisters are exactly that, true sisters and true friends. As the youngest of three girls, it is hard to feel like you are being heard or listened to. It is easy to feel small and overlooked, misunderstood even. In those moments your first instinct is to blame your sisters for making you feel that way, but in reality (and this comes with maturity and age) it is up to oneself to change the narrative of being the youngest sister. Just through conversations, my sisters and I have become so close, arguing much less about things that really don’t hold any substance. It takes time for a sister to become a friend, it did for me at least. I am proud that I am able to say that both of my sisters fit into a friendship category for me. That we all have so much love for each other, we have blossomed one single bond into two. Friends and sisters. Blood really is much thicker than water. 

  • The friend you can’t imagine not being friends with 

This goes out to every single one of my friends. I would not be who I am today without every single friend in my life, making it impossible to imagine a life with even a single one missing. From middle and high school friendships like Rachel, Ali, Bella, Kealy, Keely, Lizzy and Karina to college friendships like Elana and Vanessa, to my sisters Brooke and Brianna, they all are so significantly special to me on their own, that I can’t imagine my life with ANY of them not in it. 

  • The friend that knows about all your boy problems even though she doesn’t want to hear about it

This one is not too relevant to me anymore, due to age and me being in a relationship for about 5 years. However, at one point in time I think every single aforementioned persona in this article (at LEAST) has been a victim to a boy problem of mine. I myself have been a victim to other’s boy problems as well and although the frequency is much less than it used to be, my friends will still listen to me vent about any problem or uncomfortability I am feeling in my relationship. My friends are there for me when I need them, problem or not. 

It’s important to remind oneself of the positive people in their life. While the “7 friends”theory is not a legitimate philosophical theory, it is a nice reminder of why the people in your life are in your life.

You may also like

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *